If You Really Loved Me, You’d Give Me A Rock

9 Jan

I’m embarrassingly public on the net. I write about my near-rapes and other traumatic events, I rant, I occasionally post my physical address and then remove it. And everybody knows mieprowan is at gmail.

I don’t do this because I want to fight with any of you loons. I’m no different from you. I want love. Who doesn’t?

But you are all too different and I tire of coming too close to you, because you will likely back off once you get to know me, like so many do.

Because..I am different. I am kind of grubby sometimes, and I hardly ever perform femininity anymore. And my toilets? I replaced a broken seat tonight, with a much more solid seat, with a broken nut on one of the screws. All this with urine stink coming up from the bowl, because the water is on in the other house. 

I move a lot of water around. I like my life that way. But I’m getting old and my extremities are starting to go.

And people on the Internet hate me. Amazing.

Bleach fixes the toilets some. The pipes aren’t broken. That’s good.

My life is literally quiet. I plan to be fostering kittens again this spring.

Also I hope to do some planting, and what I really would like to do is get some local New Mexico milkweed seed so I can help the monarch butterflies who have crashed so badly last year.

And I want to grow heirloom vegetables if my feet don’t fail me.

And people on the Internet hate me.

I guess most people wind up on somebody’s shit list, but I’m trying to be helpful. That’s all I’ve ever done when I wasn’t severely depressed about some kind of loss.

There have been times when I was really depressed, when I gave people some of my best rocks. Because love.

But you’d never do that, Internet hate people. You only have accusations to offer, and cowardice.

You are your own rocks.

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5 Responses to “If You Really Loved Me, You’d Give Me A Rock”

  1. pantypopo 2014/01/09 at 5:56 pm #

    I’ll be in the forest this weekend. I will pick up the best rock I can find, for you.

    Like

    • Miep 2014/01/09 at 6:11 pm #

      Can’t go wrong with rocks :-)

      Like

  2. BroadBlogs 2014/01/10 at 12:54 pm #

    Well, I love you in an agape sort of way, since I don’t know you very well.

    Don’t worry about the haters. They are unhappy with their lives and just want some anonymous blog type person to take it out on. Nothing personal, I’m sure. They are good practice for letting things go in a Buddhist sort of way.

    Like

    • Miep 2014/01/10 at 1:11 pm #

      Thanks :-) Yes, the Internet is good practice for dealing with humans, in all sorts of ways. It’s kind of terrifying how much it shapes us these days. It’s like “Being There” come to life.

      Like

  3. Miep 2014/01/10 at 11:00 pm #

    PP: If you want to actually send me a local rock, I’d be happy to send a local one back.

    I think a rock exchange would be way cool.

    Liked by 1 person

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