I never have been able to understand this. If you forgive people who are unrepentant, what’s to stop them from doing it again?
Sure, nobody’s perfect. We all have our moments, when we look back later and think “I probably could have handled that in a better way.” Maybe we try to communicate again.
But sometimes you just have to write people off, even if you really don’t want to. You have to let go. You have to decide this is not about you anymore.
And maybe it never was about you. Maybe you just got yourself tangled up in somebody else’s demon wrestling. Maybe they got themselves tangled up in yours.
Maybe you’ll never really know what it really was. This story that you have wanted so badly to have some kind of resolution, some sort of meaning that you can distill and take on with you as a dire lesson, into the as usual uncertain future?
Maybe you just don’t get to have that. Maybe this horse is not going to relinquish any further elucidation, no matter how hard you flail at it.
And maybe, just maybe, what you do then, when you are completely exhausted, when there is nothing left of you but ash: maybe that is forgiveness.